Connected
by silverstairs
Summary: The dots finally align for Emily and Hotch, allowing them to truly connect for the first time.
1. Chapter 1

Connected

Chapter 1: Establishing a Connection

Emily waited alone on the jet, anxiously gnawing at her already ragged nails. Usually she went to JJ or Garcia, but he had said to come to him. They even made a deal. She straightened up when she heard him coming in from the back of the jet. He didn't seem surprised to see her there, must've sensed that a bad day was coming for a while. Emily looked up at and smiled in an attempt to hold off tears. She bit her lip and managed to get out,  
>"I'm…I'm having a bad day." He slid into the seat opposite her, concern evident on his face. How the roles have reversed she thought to herself. Emily used to be the one counselling Hotch; he was probably just returning the favour. Hotch said nothing, allowing Emily to speak freely.<br>"I told you I came back here because it was clean, but Hotch, I don't feel clean…"  
>"Emily-"<br>"That's it, who is Emily? Can I ever be her again? Me again? Hotch the team look at me and I know they try not to, but they see Lauren Reynolds, they see the woman who slept with a terrorist, practically prostituted herself for a profile…and the worst thing is that it's true."  
>"Emily, look at me, you were doing your job, no- one here thinks any less of you for it." Emily didn't even hear him; she was retreating back into herself, both physically and mentally, trying to shut him out. Hotch had done this himself too many times, he left his seat and crouched down beside her, forcing her to look into his eyes.<br>"Emily, listen to me, you did what anyone else would do in that situation, you saved lives Emily, never forget that." Emily forced herself to look at him, she could barely breathe she was filled with such self-hatred and loneliness. She breathed out a shaky breath,  
>"Hotch dyu remember when we went to interview the Fox?"<br>"Of course, you did a great job."  
>"Did you ever wonder how I did such a great job? I'll tell you how, because I spent two years of my life doing nothing but that, getting intimate with a killer."<br>"Emily, that was your past, no-one judges you for your actions, we're all just glad to have you here with us and safe." Hotch reached forward and clutched her hand between his two.  
>"Then why do I feel more alone than ever?" She asked, hating herself for sounding so vulnerable and needy.<br>"We're all here for you."  
>"You've all moved on, the family that I once was part of moved on when I died. I don't fit. I'm so lonely all the time and I hate myself for it Hotch."<br>"I didn't move on, not a day went by that I didn't miss you, even though I knew you were safe I wanted you to be here with me…and the team."  
>"With Ian I had a family; I was a mother to Declan. They both loved me and…and I loved them." At her confession, Emily could no longer hold the tears back; her body was wracked with sobs.<p>

She expected Hotch's reaction to be one of disgust, how could she love a killer? The truth was she didn't, she loved the man who tried and failed to teach her Irish, the father who would do anything for his son, the man who adored her and trusted her implicitly. And she betrayed that trust and tore their family apart. She hated herself for it. She hated herself for feeling this way. Hotch probably hated her for feeling this way. Emily felt utterly ashamed of herself and tried to hide her face from him. Despite this Hotch's grip on her hand never wavered, he moved up and embraced her, enveloping her shaking form. For the first time in forever, Emily felt warm. It was a bit of an awkward embrace with Hotch between crouching and standing and Emily sitting in the chair. Emily stood up to further accept his embrace and comfort. She sighed and inhaled his scent, he didn't wear cologne, but he smelled clean, the very thing she had been craving. Realising this was a rather intimate position for a boss and his subordinate; she tried to extricate herself from his arms. Hotch didn't let her go, in fact he held her tighter, not caring about his rapidly soaking collar. He held her until she couldn't cry anymore, no words were needed; his presence was enough.

"Aaron?" Emily asked hesitantly, using his first name was a rarity for her. He relished the sound of it from her lips.  
>"Yes?"<br>"I…I can't be alone tonight" she mumbled, unsure of why she was saying this to him.  
>"You can stay with me, Jack's staying at Jessica's tonight" he replied without hesitation.<p>

Emily didn't realise she had been holding her breath awaiting his response, she sagged with relief when she realised she wouldn't be alone. She hadn't been able to sleep since leaving the team; she even cut out caffeine in attempt to fall asleep from exhaustion. When she did manage to fall asleep; she was plagued with nightmares. Almost worse was waking up in a cold sweat alone. She longed for a day when she wouldn't have to sleep with her gun at hand, wouldn't have to check behind her for an enemy. 

"We can swing by your place if you need anything?" Hotch asked. Emily shook her head and gestured towards her go bag. He hadn't seen her like this since Matthew died; he felt helpless that time and was determined not to let that happen again. Gently, he took her hand, and guided her out of the jet and into his car. She was ice cold; he blasted the heating in the car, hoping to unfreeze her both physically and emotionally. The car ride was a silent one. Emily's eyes were glazed over with tears not yet shed. The car pulled up outside Hotch's apartment, the sound of his door shutting caught her attention. Her right side was exposed to the bitterly cold wind as Hotch opened the door for her. He helped her out and put his arm around her shoulder in an attempt to shield her from the wind. Emily was surprised with how affectionate he was being towards her, yet was not coherent enough to articulate it to him.

They climbed the steps to the apartment together and Emily recalled how they used to do this when he was separated from his family. She was his counsellor of sorts, his support and now he was hers. How the tables have turned, she thought to herself. He let them in and set their bags down.  
>"You can take my room, I'll sleep in Jack's."<br>"Thanks Hotch" she said reverting back to his nickname, suddenly shy at the intimacy of the arrangement. She went and got ready for bed, she slid under the duvet and was surrounding by his scent. She felt safe and found herself drifting off to sleep.  
><em>Her lips were crushed between his; her back was against the wall, it was exhilarating. She kissed him back, running her tongue along his lower lip, practically purring when his lips opened allowing them to deepen the kiss. Her heart was pounding uncontrollably, she backed away breathing deeply. She looked up into his eyes, a mix between blue and green and full of passion. He leaned forward and she could hear his gravelly voice whispering in her ear,<br>"Mo ghrása". When she looked again she was looking into deep brown eyes, warm, loving.  
>"Emily" Hotch whispered, setting Emily's heart racing. He closed the space between them, he held her face in his hands, and kissed her so tenderly it made her want to cry. Suddenly she felt her head being yanked by her hair, Once again she was looking into those blue-green eyes; this time they were cold and cruel. Roughly her top was unbuttoned and Emily knew what was coming, this didn't make it any better, she tried not to scream as she felt the stake driving into her bare abdomen. She fell to the floor, it was like she was in a sea of blood, too much to be hers, she could sense others around her. Blond hair marred with blood, empty blue eyes, one by one she saw each of her team members dead on the ground next to her. She managed to shuffle forward, looking for the one body she hadn't seen-Hotch.<br>"Emily", Hotch whispered weakly from behind her, she turned to find him lying spread-eagle on the floor, a stake protruding grotesquely from his abdomen. He tried to say something but couldn't; choking on his own blood. His eyes dimmed and finally became dull. Emily began to scream and couldn't stop._

"Emily, Emily" Hotch's voice came. He shook her and tried to wake her from the nightmare. Emily opened her eyes, they were feverish, she reached out to him, needed to see and feel that he was okay. She began to cry with relief and couldn't stop herself from shaking.  
>"Hotch…Aaron will you stay with me? Please?" she begged, annoyed at the vulnerability in her voice.<br>"Of course" he replied, rather nervously. He joined her in the bed and lay there stiffly unsure of what to do. She turned to him and put her head on his shoulder, he responded by wrapping his arms around her, almost cocooning her from the aftershock of the nightmare. He could empathise with her; he still dreamed about Foyet.

After a while Emily's breathing slowed and evened out. Hotch assumed she was asleep and gently planted a kiss on her head, and sighed rather contently, happy to be holding her in his arms. Emily smiled to herself; she wriggled in his arms so she could look up at him.  
>"I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were still awake." He apologised. Emily gazed into his eyes, warm and loving instead of cold and passionate. The intensity between them was mounting as they stared into each other's eyes. Hotch manoeuvred them so that their faces were level. He took her face between his hands and kissed her tenderly, not wanting to push her after the emotional events leading up to it. Emily felt like crying again, this was so much better than when they kissed in the dream. She lost herself in his kiss, trying not to squirm with happiness. Emily responded by kissing him harder, she pulled his lower lip between her two and ran her tongue along it, causing him to moan. He flipped her onto her back and regained dominance kissing her passionately.<p>

Emily's hands played with the hem of his t-shirt, wandering their way up. Hotch gasped at the feel of her cold hands on his bare skin. They broke apart,  
>"Emily…"<br>"What?" She feared he had changed his mind and began to feel embarrassed. "I'm sorry…I"  
>"No Emily, it's my…my scars." Emily was shocked; she was the one who found him after the attack, stayed by his bedside for hours, why would she of all people judge him for his scars? Especially when she had scars of her own. She yanked up her t-shirt exposing her lower abdomen to him. Emily took his hand and placed it on the raised scar, still pink being only seven months old. He sighed,<br>"I'm so sorry Emily." He moved down and kissed it tenderly before working his way up her exposed abdomen and back to her lips. Neither of them were aware how long they lay there, just kissing, innocent as teenagers. Emily breathed out and smiled, a genuine smile as Hotch reached out his hand to fix her hair and draw her back into his embrace.

They fell asleep intertwined with one another. Both sleeping properly for the first time in years.

"_I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship." _

― _Brené Brown_

**AN: **I'm not sure whether this will fit in with my other fic Connecting the Dots, but it can be read as a stand-alone. Originally I intended this to be a fluff piece, but it turned into hurt/comfort/angst. My other fic seems to be losing people's interest as I'm trying to keep it kinda canon so it will take a while for them to get together. So I thought I'd write a fluffy fic with lots of Hotchniss but no my brain churned out this angst fic at 1AM. I don't know whether to leave this as a oneshot with maybe an epilogue or continue with it. Let me know in the reviews! I really appreciate all reviews and could do with some guidance on where to go with this one!


	2. Chapter 2

Connected

_**Disclaimer: **_**Sadly I don't own Criminal Minds or Maroon 5**

_Chapter 2_

"_Wake you up  
>In the middle of the night to say<br>I will never walk away again  
>I'm never gonna leave this bed<br>So come here  
>And never leave this place<br>Perfection of your face  
>Slows me down, slows me down<br>So fall down  
>I need you to trust me<br>Go easy, don't rush me"  
>-"Never gonna leave this bed" Maroon 5<em>

Dawn broke and the room began to flood with light. Emily opened her eyes, and squinted; trying to adjust her eyes to the brightness. She was so used to waking up in the dark, alone, that she was disoriented. She tried to roll over, only to find she couldn't, she was surrounded, by arms. Then she remembered, Aaron. She sighed and relaxed back into his embrace, pleased at how well they fit, how comfortable the transition from colleagues to something more had been. It had been a long time coming she supposed, there had been a time when they wavered on the cusp, but then Haley died and Doyle happened and it pushed them away from the edge rather than over it. When she came back she didn't dare to hope that they could reconnect. He had moved on, found someone, Beth. She was like Haley, minus the bad traits, she seemed accepting of his job and liked Jack, but then again who couldn't? Come to think of it Emily didn't know what happened between her and Hotch. They had seemed so happy. Emily was left in deep thought about Beth and Aaron that she subconsciously tensed her body. Hotch noticed her change in demeanour, realising she was awake.

"Morning", Emily felt rather than heard Hotch say as her head was resting on his chest. They really did it, they slept together, not in a sexual sense, but somehow it was even more intimate than sex. To hold and to be held was what they both needed, the proof being that they both slept through the night, a luxury that had been denied to them by the traumas they had both endured. Emily breathed deeply, and stretched up to peck him on the lips.  
>"Morning" she smiled, languishing in the comfort of his arms around her. Hotch leaned down to capture her lips again, lazily, sleepily they kissed, and Emily could've sworn then and there that such kisses were the best in the world. Their session was cut short at the rumbling of Emily's stomach, reminding her she hadn't eaten since lunchtime the day before. Emily groaned at the interruption, evoking a laugh from Aaron.<br>"Breakfast?" he smiled. He took her hand and helped pull reluctantly her out of the bed. Out of the warmth of the covers and his arms, she shivered. She only had shorts and a t-shirt on, hotel rooms were usually uncomfortably warm, and if there was one thing she hated, it was being too hot. Right now, however, she wished for fluffy pyjamas and a cup of tea (having given up coffee). Hotch could see by her t-shirt that she was cold and handed her one of his sweatshirts. Emily gratefully put it on, she had to roll up the sleeves a bit and it fell past her shorts, but at least she was warm and it smelled like him. Hotch had to admit she looked adorable in the oversized sweatshirt, made better by the fact that it was his. He never thought he would describe her as adorable, strong, sexy and alluring, yes, but at this moment in time, with her tousled hair and makeup less face adorable was definitely the right adjective.

Once they left the sanctuary of the bedroom, Emily began to feel self-conscious. Cripplingly so. They sat at the table and a thick blanket of silence descended upon them. The only sound punctuating the silence was each one of them trying to munch quietly on their cereal. Suddenly Aaron got up and went fiddling with something, the room was then filled with Adam Levine's dulcet tones.  
>"I didn't know you were a Maroon 5 fan" Emily said, trying not to fangirl. She loved Maroon 5, knew every lyric of every song off by heart.<br>"Not particularly, but you are, you've had "This Love" as your ringtone since I've known you." Touched that he'd remembered such a minute detail, she blushed. Her blush increased as she realised his song choice, "Never gonna leave this bed". How apt, she thought to herself.  
>"Good song choice" she mumbled almost incoherently. At this he began to dramatically lip sing the song to her. It was so out of character that she couldn't help but laugh at him. Relieved that his act of idiocy had paid off, that she'd relaxed, he pulled her to her feet and they began to dance around his kitchen, his hand on her waist, her hands around his neck, very promesque.<p>

Eventually they ended up just swaying rhythmically in each other's arms._ "Take it, take it all, take all that I have"_ Emily looked up into Hotch's eyes, and saw that his eyes mirrored the words of the song. Once again they kissed, the laziness replaced with urgency and need. Emily no longer felt cold; she was burning up, almost as if she had a fever. Hotch's hands on her lower back were almost burning through the sweatshirt. Coming up from air, Emily could see her own lust reflected back at her in Hotch's eyes. Without needing to convey it in words, he silently led her back into the bedroom. Leaving their half-finished breakfasts abandoned on the table.

**AN:** I know this is quite short, but I just felt the need to write. Hopefully it's a little fluffier and a little less angsty than the previous chapter. I'd like to thank those of you who reviewed, followed and read this! I hope you enjoy it, it's nice to write them actually being together, but I do enjoy writing the build-up as well. Still not sure if I'll tie it in with Connecting the Dots and how far I'll continue with it. Let me know what you think in the reviews! PLEASE REVIEW!


	3. Chapter 3

Connected

_Chapter 3:_

"_A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous"-Ingrid Bergman_

*RING RING*, trilled Emily's phone. She ignored it and nestled back into Aaron's arms, it was dark again outside; they had spent all day in bed, getting to know every crevice, freckle and dimple of each other's bodies. Emily sighed contently and stretched only to gasp as she became aware of the soreness of her body. The type of sore she'd normally get after an intense training session, with a few additions. A patch of vivid red on her alabaster skin stood out on the crest of her right breast. _"No cleavage for a week" _Emily thought to herself, not really caring, after all she did enjoy turtle neck sweatshirts.

Aaron appeared dead to the world, fully sated he had practically passed out with her enclosed in his arms. His phone began to ring and he showed no signs of waking, Emily knew she couldn't answer it; that would only arouse suspicion, she checked the caller ID, it was Garcia. Emily groaned as she went to check her phone, already certain who the caller had been, the fact that the both of them hadn't picked up would definitely send Garcia's imagination into overdrive.

Emily tried not to jostle the bed as she got out; Aaron looked so peaceful that she didn't want to deprive him of his slumber. She slipped on one of his work shirts, and tied the buttons single-handedly while using the other hand to call Garcia back.

Aaron awoke at the loss of warmth; he could her talking quietly in the hall, but couldn't discern the second voice. A smile spread across his face as he got out of the bed, threw on boxers, and crept stealthily into the hall. She had her back to him, she was wearing one of his shirts, she looked even better in that than she did in his sweatshirt. He came up behind her and wrapped his hands around her waist, as he began to kiss his way up her neck.

Emily's voice wavered on the phone as Hotch sneaked up behind her and was mesmerising her with his lips.  
>"Garcia I-" Emily was cut off, trying to bite back a moan as Hotch sucked her tender earlobe into his mouth, the way in which he used his skill making her think of totally unrelated work thoughts.<br>"Em? What? Are you okay?" Garcia's voice trilled, taking her sudden silence as a bad thing.  
>Hotch broke away and came to stand in front of her, allowing her to compose herself enough to respond to Penelope.<br>"Yeah sorry Pen, I just got lost in a thought there for a sec." She tried to chuckle but it turned into a soft gasp as Hotch began to slowly, sensually, torturously open the buttons of the shirt one by one, kissing and sucking at the flesh that each button exposed.  
>"Emily? EMILY?"<br>Garcia's shouting briefly pulled her out of her daze,  
>"I'll be there as soon as I can, bye G" she said absently, before Aaron took the phone from her grasp, and captured her lips in a mind blowing, toe curling kiss.<br>"Aaron Hotchner, did you just engage in a phone moan?" Emily managed to get out, along with a breathy chuckle; she was slightly hyper after the whole experience.

"What's that? What did Garcia want?" He murmured before continuing the ministrations on her neck. The question jolted Emily back to her senses.  
>"Damn, we've got a case." Trying hard to stay focused, however this seemed to catch Hotch's attention as well.<p>

"We better get ready" he said resentfully.  
>"I'll probably have to go to my place, I've nothing left in my ready bag."<br>"You could just wear my shirt if you want; after all you wear it better than I do." Emily smirked at his blatant flirting, almost waiting to wake up and for all this to be a dream.  
>"You wish" she flirted back as she discarded the shirt.<p>

Hotch noticed the purplish bruises on her hips, that extended around to her back as well. He had done that to her, he sat down, shaken. The last thing he had wanted to do was cause her more pain. However the evidence of it could clearly been seen on her hips, the bruises were caused by his hands, holding on too tightly, fearing at any second she might disappear.

The change in the room's atmosphere was so sudden, for a second Emily truly feared she had woken up from a dream, yet here she was, still standing in front of Hotch, both of them practically bare.  
>"Aaron?" He wouldn't look at her. Emily's began to breathe in short, sharp breaths, her vision going blurry. <em>"He regrets this, wishes it never happened" <em>she thought to herself, working it into a fully- fledged panic attack. She could feel his hands on her and shied away from his touch. Unbeknownst to her, tears were streaming down her face.

"Emily? Emily?" He asked, panicked, wondering what had set her off, despite the obvious on her body. She looked at him; the sadness in her eyes nearly winded him. _"She regrets this, I hurt her and now she doesn't want me to touch her." _  
>"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you, I-I just" he sighed, "It's been so long since I-"<br>"It's okay" she sniffled, "I can move past this for the sake of the team if you can."  
>"What? Move past-". Then it dawned on him, "Emily, no, I-that's not what I meant." He clutched her hands in his, pleading her with his eyes to look at him. "Emily, the bruises, I caused them, you're hurt because of me." Emily's head snapped up at this, her eyes were still bright, but the tears had ebbed away.<br>"Aaron I'm not hurt, maybe a bit sore, but in a good way, I was never in pain-pleased if anything when you held on tighter." She let out a meek laugh at the misunderstanding,  
>"Besides," she said, "You didn't exactly emerge from this unscathed." She pointed out a bruise on his left shoulder, just beneath his collar bone; a distinct thumb shape could be discerned. He caught her wrist in his hand, and gently kissed each fingertip, sending a shiver down Emily's spine. She didn't know how she was going to manage at work, now aware of just how talented SSA Hotchner was with his lips. Work.<p>

"Aaron, we've got to go, we've a case, remember?" He placed a kiss to the delicate underside of her wrist before releasing her.  
>"I don't know how we're ever going to get to work if you keep doing that."<br>"Doing what?" he smiled innocently, fully aware of what he was doing. "This?" he smirked, leaning in to kiss her again. They were interrupted by Aaron's phone ringing. Emily would not like to be on the receiving end of that call from Garcia. G didn't take to kindly to be ignored. She took this opportunity to collect her scattered clothes, she got ready to go, after all she did tell Garcia she would be there soon, and she had to shower, her hair was like a bird's nest after the day before. She crept back into the room to let Aaron know she was going; she tried to sign to him that she was going to go. He feigned confusion and came over to her,  
>"Garcia could you hold for one moment please, I've something urgent to attend to." Without waiting for a reply he threw the phone on the bed and grabbed Emily in his arms, and passionately kissed her, rendering her breathless.<br>"I'd like to talk about this-us properly, when you're ready of course, I'll see you soon sweetheart."  
>Emily could only nod, she was speechless; she left his apartment, surprised that her legs still supported her. The last twenty four hours could only be described as roller-coaster of emotions. Emily hailed a cab, and sat in the backseat, closed her eyes and felt a smile spread across her face.<p>

**AN: **So here's another angsty/fluffy fic, this was on my mind all day so I just had to write it. I haven't given up on my other fic, I'm still working on it! I can't say when the next chapter for that one will be up, as it takes longer to write chapters for it than for this one. Let me know what you think and which direction I should take with this fic in the reviews! Thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed and followed so far! It really encourages me to keep writing.  
>PLEASE REVIEW!<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Connected

_Chapter 4:_

"_Secrets could never be rushed. They had to come of their own accord, on their own schedule. That way, when they came, they offered themselves as a gift."_

― _Donna Jo Napoli Bound_

Emily gingerly made her way into the bullpen, trying not wince at the toll their activities had taken on her body. She met up with Morgan on the way in,  
>"Hey Emily, are you hurt? You're walking funny."<br>"Oh this" she said gesturing vaguely, "I put in some hours training earlier, and I'm not as accustomed to it as usual I guess."  
>"Emily, you should've said, I would've gone with you. We could hit the gym after this case if you want?" The last thing Emily wanted to do was hit the gym, she wanted to hit the bed, preferably with Aaron.<p>

She was spared from answering as Hotch came into view in full work mode. Something about a man in a suit just did it for her, she had to bite back a sigh, resigned to micro-managing her facial expressions in front of the team until they decided what exactly "they" were.  
>"Conference room in five." He said without looking up from the report. As he walked away Emily had to restrain herself from admiring his physique. Luckily for her Morgan also seemed distracted. Penelope scurried past them, tottering on platform electric pink heels.<br>"Hey, baby-girl?" Morgan called after her, which she pretended not to hear and carry on. Emily was confused, Garcia never passed up on an opportunity to sweet talk with Morgan. However she was also relieved as it meant she had escaped Garcia's wrath over the missed phone-call. 3  
>"Derek what's going on?"<br>"I dunno, I stayed at her place last night and now she's acting all weird about it." Emily's eyebrows shot up, Morgan and Garcia? They always flirted but she thought that had always just been banter, besides Penelope was with Kevin.  
>"I shouldn't have asked, it's really none of my business."<br>"It was nothing Em, she had too much to drink and called me to look after her" at Emily's sceptical look he added, "I slept on the couch!"  
>"Oh, well does she remember that?"<p>

Their conversation was cut short as they entered the room and had to snap into profiling mode. Garcia avoided eye contact with Morgan the whole time; you didn't have to be a profiler to know something was up between the two of them. Taking this on board Emily tried not to let her eyes linger on anyone or avoid anyone for too long, the team had to believe everything was the same as it was twenty four hours ago. She tried to pay attention, adding observations her and there, but every-time she caught sight of Hotch's lips, shut together in a tight line, she couldn't help but want to part them with her own, feel his on hers. She was in a daze until she heard him say:  
>"Wheels up in thirty." Sluggishly they moved out of the room, Emily trying not to visibly wince in doing so. She was just at her desk, when she heard him say from the catwalk,<br>"Prentiss, a word in my office." She shrugged it off to her team mates, letting them believe it had something to do with her return and reintegration.

She noticed his blinds were shut and felt her stomach flutter in anticipation. Gently she opened the door and shut it softly behind her. Hotch was sitting on the couch rather than behind his desk, he got up and proffered his hand to her, a smile breaking out on his face. Emily mirrored his smile. She took his hand and joined him in sitting on the couch, their hands intertwined on his lap.  
>"I know this isn't the right time, but what I do know is that you're not ready to tell the team about us." The word "us" sent a shiver up Emily's spine, it just sounded right.<br>"It's all so new Aaron, I've bared everything to the team, they know all about my past and it's a raw feeling, being so exposed, I'd like to keep this ours for now." She tightened his grip on his hand, signalling she wanted him despite not wanting to share it with the team just yet.  
>"I thought that you would say something like that, in that case we better come up with some ground rules for when we're on a case."<br>"Oh" Emily said, wondering if that's what it was like for Hotch and JJ when she was "dead."  
>"Like calling you Hotch and not Aaron?"<br>"Probably for the best" he smiled ruefully, he loved the way his name sounded coming from her lips.  
>"It also means I can't do this" he said leaning forward and kissing her gently on the lips. Emily sighed when he broke away; she was going to miss this, even for a few days.<br>"I guess not booty calls either" she joked laughing at the way his eyes widened at her suggestion. Once they had all bases covered, she pecked him on the lips, and left the office trying not to beam like a Cheshire cat.

They travelled in separate cars to the jet, trying not to be cooped up in a tight space; for fear that a simple brush of a hand, murmur in an ear or a look would give them away. Despite their efforts they ended up sitting together on the jet with only an armrest between them. Emily tried to focus on the case file in front of her and not the heat radiating from the man next to her. There was no hope of a reprieve from the tantalisation, all the team were wide awake; even if they were asleep it would be too risky. Everything at work would be too risky until they told them, yet another secret Emily was keeping from the team. She hoped that it wouldn't be one secret too much, that they wouldn't resent her and Hotch when it was revealed.

Emily was caught unawares as the jet hit a patch of turbulence. She didn't have her seatbelt on and was practically tossed onto Hotch. He steadied (or rather dizzied) her with a hand around her waist.  
>"Thanks" she managed to get back, as he reached across her to help her with her seatbelt, brushing past her waist again. Emily took a shaky breath.<br>"You okay Em?" JJ asked.  
>"Yeah I just really hate turbulence" she lied. Hotch grasped her wrist, as he couldn't hold her hand, and gently squeezed it in reassurance.<br>"We're almost there" he said, the look of concern evident in his eyes to Emily, and not she hoped, to the rest of the team. The pressure on her wrist, combined with his coarse hand on her smooth skin was having a greater effect than any turbulence could. _"Yep",_ Emily thought to herself, _"This is going to be torture."_

**AN: **So this chapter is set in episode 7x13, hence the whole Garcia/Morgan awkwardness. Let me know what you think about the idea of case fics in the reviews (seeing as my case fic in Connecting the Dots hasn't got much of a response) or would it be better to focus on them outside of cases or both? Thank you to all of those who have read; followed and reviewed so far! I really really am grateful for all of them, they are so encouraging! Check out my other fic and PLEASE REVIEW!


	5. Chapter 5

Connected

_Chapter 5:_

"_It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, such as deep-sea diving equipment or a pair of large pillows, but deciding what is right is much trickier."_

― _Lemony Snicket, The Slippery Slope_

The jet touched down and Emily let out a sigh of relief. The case hadn't been too taxing on her; Reid had the biggest part to play, yet she still felt exhausted and was looking forward to getting home and putting her feet up. It was hard wearing high heeled boots all day, despite how good they looked compare to flats. The soreness in her body had calmed to a dull ache when she moved, she tried her best not to let it show, both for her sake and Hotch's. She didn't want him to regret what had happened between them, besides, if her imagination wasn't playing tricks on her, she could've sworn she saw him massaging his shoulder at least once or twice. She smirked to herself remembering it. The rest of the team picked up on this;  
>"Em, what's got you in such a good mood?" asked an exhausted JJ. She shrugged it off and said,<br>"Nothing, I guess I'm glad to be back is all." The team moved in to embrace her, which was no easy task on the jet, yet somehow they managed. Emily could distinguish Hotch's hands on her from the rest, only he could set her skin on fire. This in turn only caused her to smile wider.  
>"Why don't we go out for a drink? We never properly celebrated you coming back to us Ems," Morgan suggested.<p>

Emily awaited Hotch's response before giving her own, she had conflicted feelings about going out with the team. Going out meant being cautious around each other, despite the influence of alcohol, on the other hand she didn't want to go without him. She knew he probably wanted to go home and see Jack, so she was surprised when she heard him say,  
>"I just have to put Jack to bed and then I'll join you."<br>"We should go all out, make this a proper welcome home," Reid said, usually not one for "going all out". The agents disembarked the jet and made a beeline for the coffee machine before leaving to get ready for the night's festivities. Emily went to tell Garcia about tonight's plans when she saw Morgan making his way to her office, she decided to text her instead, let them get their awkward conversation out of the way first.

Emily stood in front of her open wardrobe, wearing nothing but a towel, for a good half hour. For the life of her she couldn't decide what to wear. The fear was that she would be too casual or too dressy. She opted not to go for pants or a skirt; after all she was stuck in them every day of the week. Then she saw it, hanging near the back, protected with a plastic sleeve, the little black dress she wore for viper. She tried to repress the memory of flirting with him. Emily tried the dress on and was delighted to find that it still fit, it had a deep v at eh back, clung to her body and had a square neck, displaying just enough cleavage. "Shit," she thought to herself, remembering the memento Hotch had left her; she looked in the mirror to examine the damage. The love-bite had faded from an angry red to a sickly yellowish brown colour; there was nothing for it but to cover it with makeup and hope for the best. She curled her hair, painstakingly applied her makeup and squeezed into a pair of killer heels. She examined herself in the mirror before heading out, she thought perhaps the dress looked better when she had a fringe and contemplated getting one again before realising the time and rushing out.

When Emily arrived at the bar most of the team were there besides from Garcia and Kevin who were on a date. She could feel his eyes on her immediately as she made her way to the table, trying not to blush.  
>"Hey guys, sorry I'm late," she apologised.<br>"It's your party you can be fashionably late if you want to," JJ joked.

Soon the drinks were flowing and their little group was drawing more and more attention to itself. Morgan was pulled away by a swarm of women, whom he was now dancing in the middle of, loving the attention. Emily abstained from anything with alcohol, needing a clear head. JJ pulled her out onto the dance-floor, the pink tinge in her cheeks giving her away as slightly intoxicated. JJ was wearing a baby blue body contour dress that brought out her eyes, and brought out the men from their seats. She was surrounded by admirers who she fended off by flashing them her ring-finger, despite not actually being married yet.

Emily had no such excuse and found herself being hit on by JJ's rejects, when suddenly she felt herself being enveloped in a bear hug. The air was squeezed out of her,  
>"Emily, I never thought I'd see you again, you look amazing." She nearly choked at the sight in front of her. Max, as in her ex-boyfriend Max.<br>"Uh, hi Max, how have you been?" she asked while trying to extricate herself from his death grip. She just wanted to be away from him, after all their relationship hadn't exactly ended amicably. She looked into his green eyes and was reminded strikingly of Ian. Despite her wriggling he wouldn't lessen his grip.  
>"Just one dance, for old time's sake," he said, not even asking her permission before sliding one of his hands to her waist and the other to the back of her neck, pulling her into him. Emily tried to make it through one dance, which it couldn't even be classified as, as she could barely move she was pressed so closely to him.<p>

Finally the song ended and she tried to politely disengage. He clung on, moving one hand further down and leaning in to kiss her. She turned her head and said,  
>"Max no, it was nice to see you and all but I must go."<br>"You're not getting away that easy, I let you go once and I'm not going to let that happen again." He grabbed her by the head and forcefully kissed her. Out of the corner of her eye she could see someone coming towards them, then the pressure was off her mouth and she could breathe again.  
>"What dyu want man, can't you see I'm in the middle of something?" Max practically spat.<br>"I was wondering if I could cut in," came Hotch's voice. Emily nearly fell over with relief.  
>"No way."<br>"I believe I wasn't asking you," Hotch replied looking at Emily. He went to take her hand, but was prevented from doing so by Max.  
>"If you don't remove your hands from her, I will not hesitate to break them." The look in his eyes showed that Hotch would follow through if he had to. Max let go of her and stalked away from them, moving onto his next target.<p>

Hotch pulled her into her arms, and hugged her.  
>"Thank you Aaron, but what about the team?"<br>"They suggested I go help, not that I didn't want to from the moment you went dancing without me."  
>"I suppose we better dance so," Emily smiled up at him. He twirled her around the floor until they were gasping for breath; luckily for them a slow song came on, allowing them to catch their breath. Her hand was in his and the other resting on his shoulder. They were cheek to cheek and Hotch whispered in her ear,<br>"I want you to come home with me tonight." They would've left right then if they could have. Emily went to freshen up after their dancing session; she reapplied her lipstick and mascara before heading back out. Closing time was looming and their group along with a few lovesick couples remained. Emily headed over to their table where Rossi and Morgan were comparing the number of phone numbers they had collected. The group cheered as she walked over to them, they all had champagne and were preparing to make a toast to her.  
>"Emily, words can't describe how good it is to have you back," Hotch lead, coming over to her and handing her a flute containing orange juice, and placing his now spare hand around her waist. She hoped it wouldn't look suspicious to the team, but judging by their eyes none of them were paying much attention. The alcohol had made them more emotional than usual and Emily was surprised to see most of them had tears in their eyes.<br>"Your absence, while short, impacted us all, you changed our lives for the better Emily, and without you they felt empty. When you came home to us, you weren't the only one who came home, for the first time in a year we all felt at home again." Emily couldn't help but let a few tears spill down her cheeks, happy ones this time.  
>"Hip hip hurray!" they blubbered, all dabbing the corners of their eyes with tissues that Garcia had the foresight to bring.<p>

After that they left in dribs and drabs until it was just Emily and Hotch left. Hand in hand they left the club unaware of the pair of eyes keenly watching them.

**AN:** So there's some linking with this chapter and "Connecting the Dots." I'm thinking of doing a Jack and Emily chapter next. Thank you so much to all of you who have read, reviewed, favourite and followed my story so far! I'm really enjoying writing it and I hope that you enjoy reading it. PLEASE REVIEW!


	6. Chapter 6

Connected

_Chapter 6:_

_Son, brother, father, lover, friend. There is room in the heart for all the affections, as there is room in heaven for all the stars._

_Victor Hugo_

Emily awoke as rain began to pour down, clattering overhead. She had one arm thrown over Aaron's chest and the other resting on his shoulder. She yawned and nuzzled against him, she always loved the sound of rain on the roof. This time it was especially enjoyable being snuggled up with him. She closed her eyes and smiled remembering last night's events.

"_I thought they'd never leave," Hotch smiled and drew her in for a kiss. It was their first public display of affection for one another and Emily had to admit that it felt good. They left soon after that, Hotch taking hold of her hand on the way out, another first for them. They were acting like a real couple and it surprised and comforted her at how easy it was. Emily drove, Hotch had had a few beers and as a federal agent he couldn't exactly break the law. On autopilot she drove to her apartment, as they recounted the whole Max incident.  
>"I never liked him you know," Hotch admitted.<br>"Well up to now I haven't exactly had the best taste in men," she smirked back at him.  
>"Aaron, do you think that the team suspect anything?"<br>"Emily if I hadn't stepped in Rossi would have, Morgan was too busy being chatted up and Reid said and I quote, "I don't give off Alpha male vibes"."  
>She couldn't help but laugh at that, it was just typical Reid; Emily also remembered how much he too hated Max.<br>"So we're in the clear?"  
>"Yes, it took a great amount of self -control not to punch him on my part though."<br>"Me too." _

_The car pulled up outside her apartment block and they hurried to get in out of the cold. Luckily the elevator was back in order; Emily didn't feel physically able to walk up three flights of stairs in stiletto heels. Emily began to feel claustrophobic as the tension in the lift mounted.  
>"A-"she didn't get to finish as his mouth descended on hers. He had her pressed up against the wall of the elevator, he grabbed her hands in one of his own and held them above her hand and splayed his other on the wall for leverage. Breathlessly the separated as the doors of the lift slid open. <em>

_Emily's hands were shaking as she fumbled with her keys, trying to get them in the lock, desperately wishing she wasn't being so clumsy. Technically it wasn't her fault; it was Hotch's effect on her. Hotch took the keys out of her hands and opened the locks on his first try. He pulled her into the apartment after him, flung the keys on the table and sought her lips again. They stumbled in the darkness into her bedroom and finished what they had started in the lift._

Emily awoke again, unaware that she had drifted back to sleep, she was parched and gently got out of the bed. Shivering at the cold she pulled on a nightdress and a robe. She made her way to the kitchen and was draining a glass of water when she felt Hotch slide his hands around her waist. He rested his head on her shoulder,  
>"Good morning," he said and placed a kiss on her cheek. A radiant smile broke out on her face at the easy affection between them. She turned in his arms to face him,<br>"Morning, do you want breakfast?"  
>"I can't, I promised Jack I'd take him out for breakfast, why don't you come with us?" The idea of going out with them kind of frightened her, Jack was inquisitive, he'd be sure to ask question and Emily didn't know how she was going to fend them off, or if she was even supposed to.<br>"Aaron, are we going to tell him about us? He's bound to be curious, seeing as the rest of the team won't be there."  
>"We can if you want, he likes you Emily, you've nothing to worry about," he reassured her. Still he didn't want him to see her as a replacement for Haley and resent her, even though he had liked Beth. The reminder of Beth only increased her anxiety, he had liked her and she left, this time he mightn't be so accepting.<p>

Hotch looked so hopeful as he smiled at her that she couldn't say no. She sighed and said,  
>"I'll come, I just hope he's okay with us," knowing that if he didn't the likelihood that whatever they had between them would disintegrate was high. At her response Hotch kissed her, he squeezed her hands in his own and said,<br>"Emily he's going to love you, he already does." The rate at which their relationship was developing was dizzying. However she always knew that if they did acknowledge their feelings for each other that they wouldn't toe the waters but dive in head first.

Emily found herself standing in front of her wardrobe once again; she was finding it harder to pick something to wear for Jack than she did for the party. Hotch took in her conflicted expression and laughed at her. Startled she turned to face him only to find him in nothing but a towel and dripping wet.  
>"Emily you're not meeting the queen, jeans and a sweatshirt will do," he joked. Emily didn't hear a word he just said, she was mesmerised by his body, she hadn't paid it enough attention and now taking a step back she could fully admire. The rivulets of water streaming down his body certainly added to the aesthetic.<br>"Emily?"  
>"Huh?"<br>"Did you hear a word I just said?" he laughed. He could tell by the blush spreading across her cheeks that she hadn't.  
>"I'm sorry…I was…distracted," she mumbled. She needed to focus, it was nearly ten thirty and Aaron told Jessica that he would collect Jack at eleven. She sighed, despite the amount of clothes she had in front of her none of them were exactly suitable for being introduced to your boyfriendboss' son as his girlfriend.

"I think you should go with that pink top, you don't wear pink enough," Hotch suggested. Emily pulled the cashmere, baby pink, loose necked jumper from her shelf. She paired it with a pair of navy skinny jeans and heeled boots. She applied light makeup and fixed her hair while Hotch got dressed; he had nothing else to wear but the clothes from the night before. Dark denim jeans, a white crew-neck tee and a dark blue shirt with an almost indiscernible pattern on it.

Finally they were ready to go; Emily's nerves were increasing by the minute. She was second guessing herself. She knew Jack; he liked her, thought of her as an aunt like JJ. She feared that being his aunt was ok but being his dad's girlfriend, and potentially his mum's replacement would be anything but okay. They pulled up outside Jessica's house, Hotch squeezed her hand in his and said to her,  
>"You ready?" he smiled at her. She took a deep breath and opened her car door, knowing that by the end of the day she and Aaron would be an official couple or a hot mess.<p>

**AN: I'll hopefully get to update both this and "Connecting the Dots" at the weekend. Thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, followed and favourited my story so far! I really am grateful for every view, review, follow and favourite as I find them incredibly encouraging. I hope you enjoy this chapter. PLEASE REVIEW!**


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